Today is my due date and the twins are 9 days old. Weâre all settling in for the winter, and now that Iâm adjusting nicely, Iâm ready to start blogging again. I guess I should start with the birth story.
I had a pretty hard time of it, but Iâm still not sure if I really had it hard or if Iâm just a sissy. I ended up making it to my scheduled date of December 1st, at 38w5d, only to find out I needed a general anesthesia, rather than a spinal because of a lovely blood disorder we have in our family. I was a little nervous about that and a little disappointed too about not being able to see them born, but whatever we had to do, we had to do. I was shaking so bad by the time we got into the OR and T took a pic of me spread eagled out like I was about to be crucified. It is a really strange picture.
When I awoke, I saw my babies for the first time and my boy had the most hilarious look on his face. It was as though he were thinking, "Wait a minute, this is not the virtual reality I ordered, somethingâs wrong!" He furrowed his brow and looked a little pissed off. Then the rest of that day is just a blur of pain.
Now pain is something I thought I had come to terms with, since tearing ligaments in both my hip joints 18 years ago. It has been so bad that I canât walk at times, and I thought that was the worst I would ever know. I thought childbirth would be a breeze after going through dozens of spasms of my hip muscles every year. So I know what excruciating is.
I now know the true meaning of the word agonizing. Iâm not sure what they gave me that first day, but I do not remember much. I know that T and a friend, M, were there to take care of the babies, because I could not form sentences much less get up. I am very grateful for that. I had no idea. Some things I read said, Oh, sure, I was up and out of bed that same day! Fuckers.
I was in the hospital for five days, and from what I understand, I did pretty well, and man these kids are pretty. In spite of the pain, I am having blast with these kids. Nursing has also been extremely painful, not because of the babies, but because of me. My tolerance for pain just is not there. My poor breasts are so tender there just is no way to get them comfortably latched, although I have been pumping and they are getting a little breast milk every day. But even pumping hurts like hell.
Which leads me to introduce the babies: Grace Toreen, who has come to be known as Squeak, because she makes the cutest little noises and sounds just like a little kitten.
She also has a suck reflex like a black hole. Anything that comes near her mouth, whether itâs her own fist, a bottle, a pacifier, or my nipple, gets immediately sucked into an alternate universe. Iâm telling you, that first nursing session I thought my entire breast was gone, she sucked so hard. When she eats, she acts like sheâs starving, which makes for some interesting feeding sessions since her little head is tiny and she is very petite, so if I donât hold her head just right, milk spews out of her nose and then we have a bit of trauma.
Then we have Lips. This pretty boy has a set of lips that rival Mick Jagger and would make a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon blush.
These definitely came from the sperm donor, as C has a pretty mouth, it is nothing like this. But he definitely has our eyes. This child should be on the cover of Vogue. Heâs definitely the fussier of the two, and opposed to his sister, I have to practically force him to eat. He makes the most amusing faces, and furrows his brow just like he did right after birth, with an incredulous look, like he canât believe what heâs seeing. Iâve caught him smiling a few times, although all the websites say itâs too early for it to be an emotional response. Like any new mother , I think, bull. He loves me, thatâs why heâs smiling.
I have a few posts brewing about donor issues Iâve already faced, and the celebrity that comes with having twins. But right now Lips is being Fussy Britches, so I will be back in a few days. I promise I wonât go so long between posts now that Iâm functional. Thanks for reading. BTW thier vitals: Tori, 6 lbs, 3 oz, 20 in. Dylan, 6 lbs 0 oz, 20 in.
